Tag Archives: Transcendental Meditation TM

The Road Back to Meditation

BY KIMBERLY MAYER

I’ve been down this road before. I am checking out SHIRe, a self-healing and integration retreat on San Juan Island where the Sakya Buddhist retreat center had been. Years ago I got lost looking for it. But the monks have moved on now, having been called back to the Sakya Monastery of Tibetan Buddhism in Seattle. And I am looking for SHIRe, a new retreat. Once again, even my GPS suffers some confusion on Bullfrog Road. 

“Arrived” it said. But where?

Oh there it is. Up a ways standing before me, a Tibetan structure striking in its splendid colors against the browns and greens of the forest. A Stupa shrine stands before it. Inside I meet Tony Held, the young man who purchased the 20 acre property and started the “spirituality through experiential learning” nonprofit, Living Wisdom Project. 

Here at Sunday’s Open Meditation, everyone in the community is invited to practice any form of meditation they desire in a large bright room with a sky blue ceiling. We’ll call it Himalayan blue. The idea is that it is more powerful to meditate in a group than singularly. In physics this is called constructive interference: when two waves meet creating a bigger wave.

For years now I have been wanting to start up the Transcendental Meditation (TM) practice I had learned, and loved, when I was a college student in the 60’s. Somewhere along the line I dropped it. I was concerned I did not remember my mantra correctly and that I would have to be officially retrained. But after a few minutes with Tony Held, I realized how wrong I was. There is no mantra police and no one to hear. 

“Let’s do it,” he said and we meditated together, Tony, in his way, and me, my way. Seems it was in me all this time. Even the mantra, as it’s the repetition, most likely, that matters. Right or wrong it opened the door. I felt it again, the effortlessness, the bliss beyond thought or words, really, and I’ve been practicing it on my own every day since. 

If I hadn’t been out scouting a topic for this column I never would have found it. Certain days, certain encounters are auspicious. And the more I think about it, today is much like the 60’s. In a tumultuous, troubled time with an ever-widening war once again, we turn to meditation, music, art, literature, and the like. For all the inner peace we can find, and not be overrun. 

Originally published August 12, 2026 in The Journal of the San Juan Islands

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Renewal

Untitled by Cy Twombly

BY KIMBERLY MAYER

Inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that’s where you renew your springs that never dry up.” Pearl Buck

Traveling east in a van on Rt. 188 the earth turned red and glacial boulders, large and rounded, studded the hills. Behind us was San Diego, ahead was more of this mountainous landscape as we twisted on a narrow winding road between the desert and the sea. Tecate, a city that straddles both sides of the border, is where we disembarked. And there, with Customs officers and the formidable wall behind us, we were ensconced for a week in Rancho La Puerta, a sprawling Wellness Resort and Spa in Baja California, Mexico.

It isn’t on every trip that we carry intentions, but that’s precisely what I’d brought with me. The intention to resume daily meditation practice after all these years, and to paint and draw again. In this way I arrived at a place I’d never been before in hopes of finding some things I’d lost along the way: a Transcendental Meditation(TM) mantra long forgotten, and a hand in art that, over the years, had given way to writing. 

There began the inner journey. “When we engage in a creative recovery,” writes Julia Cameron in The Artist’s Way, “we enter into a withdrawal process from life as we know it. Withdrawal is another way of saying detachment or nonattachment, which is emblematic of consistent work with any meditation practice.” Much like checking passports into the safe, our cell phones were tucked away for the week. I know I’m not alone in saying I left sleepless nights over the war in Ukraine back in the states. War doesn’t go away; we were just less embedded in it. 

Brick paths wound through 32 acres of naturalized gardens in the 4000 acre chaparral landscape, and our casita was a good distance from everything, by design. Walking like that, in nature and by oneself, is meditative in itself. The rituals I treasured all week were Morning Pages, Meditation, Poetry as meditation prompts, and Sound Healing. I learned the simple truth that all meditation works, it needn’t be TM. I bypassed spa treatments, avoided arduous exercise, and walked endlessly. 

A labyrinth in the woods called to me. My creative life was nothing if not a spiral path.

Every writer will know that The Censor is something we deal with constantly in an effort to keep her out of the room. The Censor is perfectionism. So what did she do but grab her post over the years as guardian at the door of artwork. I couldn’t get in. Here at The Ranch sat a sweet little art studio, empty most of the time, full of supplies, and a sympathetic instructor who strolled through now and then. Somehow I gave myself permission, and from then on nothing could keep me out.

There is so much joy in painting like a three year old again! Drawing is harder, but I worked at it, loving that the instructor called gum erasures “Prozac for artists.” Like Morning Pages there were no good drawings or bad drawings. It doesn’t matter at all; it only matters that I’m doing it. I’ve got this! I thought. 

I had to come all that way to unblock—and now I had to figure how to bring it all home with me: the meditation practice and the practice of making art. The week was ending and as if on cue the climate was warming, time for me to migrate north. A writing hut awaits me on San Juan Island, which will now be shared with sketchbooks, charcoal, kneeded gum erasures, blending stumps, brushes and watercolors. Oh what a happy little hut it will be. 

Like the Englishman who went up a hill but came down a mountain, from here on out I’ll be painting and drawing if not writing.

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